Sunday, July 16th, 2006
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10:08 pm - it's funny
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In the new online crazy that is myspace we've all neglected out livejournals.
It's funny how I still have the same LJs that I read even if I don't even know that person anymore. I'm such an internet stalker when I have the time.
Well....even though we have no bottles in our hands here's a cheer to old times and new adventures that lay before us.
In about a month I'll be in San Antonio for the toughest 8 weeks of my life probably.
Then off to Monterey California for that hardest 2 years of training I'll ever have.
I'm going to learn so much.
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Sunday, June 18th, 2006
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12:07 pm - SKY DIVING!
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HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS!!!!!
I totally flung myself out of a perfectly good plane yesterday at 13,500 feet. I had a hot ass dude strapped to my back. We spun around in the air and fell going 160 mph before we opened the chute. Then I got to steer us and we spun and flipped and it was incredible....
it was the most life changing experience...
I know have battle wounds...bruises on my shoulders and legs from the harness!!!!!!
Totally Cerealllllll!
There aren't a lot of things in this world that leave me speechless but I couldn't do anything but smile and laugh when i got back down to the ground...
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Saturday, June 3rd, 2006
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1:50 pm - Who's got the herb?
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I'm thinking of that Jenny Lewis song from her new record.
So happpppppyyyyyyyyy happppppppyyyyyy oooh so happpyyy
anyway- life is wonderful and I don't think I've ever been this euphoric and happy my entire life. It gets sad sometimes though. Matthew and I were canoeing last week and it was so beautiful that I told him it almost made me sad because it felt like nothing could ever be that perfect and happy again.
I'm a blessed blessed little girl. A few years of shit really pays off in the long run. I hope everyone I know can be this happy one day.
Last night was first friday again and we saw Elevated. Talked to hottie mcbassplayer and uh...he's so mine....
Andy told me last night that him and paige think that Matthew and I belong together. That made me feel a little awkward the rest of the night and then every time I looked at Matthew I though....hmmmm....and then....EW no.....
It'd be like dating meacham only weirder.
If anybody still reads this, which I don't think anyone does, I want to know the name of the band who sings this particular song. Theres a line it where they say "ANd you hang like a star....for starving eyes to see....a few more hours.. now I'm confused is the death really you...and do these dreams have any meaning...I think it's more like a ghost that's been following us both something more than a feeling..."
anyway I don't know if those are the right words but that's whats in my head. It was on a super old mixed CD I had and when I tried to put it on my iPod it was all scratched. So anyone ideas on who that is would be most appreciated..
thanks and I hope you all have wonderful happy days!
I love you all! Yes all of you!
I can't stop smiling.......
current music: Who's got the herb?- in my head from the show last night
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Saturday, May 6th, 2006
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10:38 am - let's get this party started move to the rythm oooh
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Man. You all need to come down to my new home in beautiful and exciting downtown st. pete. It actually makes me NOT hate Florida for once.
Cereaously though- Every first friday of every month they have this thing called (you guessed it) first Friday. This really awesome reggae band plays at Fortunatos After Dark and it is a rocking good time.
They are an amazing band. Find them on myspace they are "Elevated"
I invite you all to come out sometime.
long as ya don't freak out and throw beer on anyone. Then you're voted off the island.
Seriously you've all got to check out Elevated on myspace.
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Thursday, April 20th, 2006
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6:01 pm - whoa...
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Saturday, March 25th, 2006
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1:12 am - THWACK! (Or how I learned to never take it from the back again)
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Today was the first day I felt excited about being single....
And NOTHING happened to make me feel that way. It just sort of hit me.
Much debauchery must start immediatly.
Single friends: Starting now weekends are for playing with boys....
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Thursday, March 23rd, 2006
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11:28 pm - Katie and Brian sitting in a tree THWACK THWACK THWACK THWACK I-N-G
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only I still have hours of painting left to do. I painted from 5pm until 10 tonight. Of course the ladies and I took a dinner break but still...LOTS OF PAINTING. Holy crap. AND all we got done was the flipping trim because there is sooooooo much to paint. corners and ledges and grooves and paneling. I am exhausted. This has been the busiest week ever.
I was thoroughly convinced I was going to get fired today. I forgot to send an important report to some important so and so and so I sped to work to get there before my boss so I could send it. I was freaking all night last night so I couldn't go to sleep. So today has been long...
In other news...I don't want boyfriends anymore. I am going to be celibate for one year starting.....later...
Funniest thing this week: The Chicken Fuck
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Wednesday, March 22nd, 2006
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1:43 pm - And dreams they come, and dreams they go, but we'll follow the next train anyway...
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So I keep having these dreams that I am calling people.
I'll call them and it'll be really late at night and they'll either hang up or be really annoyed and talk to me.
Then I thought about those dreams for a minute while I was at work this morning and thought "what if those aren't dreams and I am sleep dialing?"
I think I would have a lot of angry messages though, if I were calling people for real.
There is something terrible in my eye...
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Sunday, March 19th, 2006
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3:33 pm - Anything to keep me distracted...
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OK. As much as I love my new house I hate moving.
I have to paint this apartment back to white before I start painting the new house this week. Packing isn't so bad except I keep finding things that make me all sad and whatnot. Pictures, momentos, things like that.
I hate hate hate this painting though. Thats'the shitty part of moving. Painting the house wont be so bad because I'll be excited to move in but this place is tedious to say the least.
Anyone who wants to come over Wednesday or Thursday to the new place to help me paint is more than welcome. I can use all the help I can get.
Free food and drink and the pleasure of my company for anybody who helps out. Or you can be lame and wait until the next weekend when I have my little "woo I moved in finally" party. all are invited
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Saturday, March 18th, 2006
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5:13 pm
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Unbutton your clothes,
Undress your soul.
Show them your vigor
Are those inhibitions easiest to fear?
Take this gasoline tin
Head up high
Walk like a winner
Let the bare feet be the last
sound they hear...
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Tuesday, March 14th, 2006
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1:11 am
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When Ian and I broke up years ago,I was completely heatbroken. Anyone who knew me then knows that, however, I could always forget about him when I was with another guy. Always. It made me feel better to have another boy to kiss and cuddle. This time, with this particular man, being with another guy just hurts even more. When I kiss another guy I want it to be him. When I let another guy hold me I want it to be him. I know its better for both of us to not be together, hell, it was my decision. If I asked him to come back he would whole heartedly, and its really hard to be strong when thats the case. I haven't stopped caring about him or loving him at all. I can only push it down somewhere that only comes out when I hear bad love songs on 94.9. I really miss him. I really love him. I have to try and forget him though and thats surprisingly harder than a lot of things I've dealt with. I am moving in two weeks and I don't plan on telling him where I am moving to or what my number is. It hurts to abandon someone like that because even though we don't talk or see eachother he at least knows where I am and it makes me feel better. I don't know. I love him. Life goes on though, right?
I can only give you love that lasts forever
and a promise to be near each time you call
and the only heart I own for you and you alone,
That's all. That's all.
I can only give you country walks in springtime
and a hand to hold when leaves begin to fall
and a love who's burning light will warm the winter nights
That's all. That's all.
There are those, I am sure, who have told you
They would give you the world for a toy
all I have are these arms to enfold you
and a love time can never destroy
If you're wondering what I am asking in return dear
you'll be glad to know that my demands are small
Say its me that you adore, for now and evermore
That's all. Thats all...
current mood: heartbroken
current music: 95 north- Ida
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Friday, March 10th, 2006
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10:55 pm - How the thought of you does things to me
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1:06 am - It just is
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Conflicting thoughts and feelings aren'tmy favorite ones to have. (my spacebar is not working as well as I'd like it to so please excuse any words that suddenly married) Look, I'll be honest with myself here. I miss being the way I used to be in some sense. I don't miss the true underlying emotions and feelings of that time, but I certainly miss the days where responsibility was a foriegn word and I could always just hop in the car with a friend and drive all night to our destination, even if we had to be up at 8am. This job, this life, this comfort, this stability, these newfound relationships. THey are all so foriegn to me and I am not sure I like it as much as I thought I would. I sometimes feel that I am 30 years old. I want to be 19 again often but remind myself that I am a better person the way I am. I no longer am a self conscious lackey who takes insults veiled as concern. I no longer am the irresponsible teen struggling through life. I also am happy. So happy. Days go by where I just have to stop and realize how good life is. but inspite of all of the happiness, i still tend to miss a time where I was miserable and sad. Why?
current mood:  contemplative
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Monday, March 6th, 2006
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1:07 am - WOOOO! COLDPLAY!!
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DUde, COldplay rocked tonight. Seriously.
Fiona Apple sucks.
Everyone in our section was drunk and stoned and it was so much fun. Everyone had a good time together even though we didn't know eachother.
It was my first big concert and lemme tell you the difference between going to a small show and a big concert. THe people at the big concerts aren't pretentious little indie fucks who think they are btter than you. Everyone was soooo nice tonight... Loved it!
I love meacham for getting my ticket and for being so amazing and wonderful.
oh yeha nd fuck people who know Ian.
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Saturday, March 4th, 2006
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2:30 pm - Jill knew what she was talking about...
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I know everyones a good person inside. Everyone wants just to be loved inside so whenever I think how you wasted my time, I'll try to remember the good things inside. Well you haven't killed anyone as far as we know and you see very nice to your sister. You have very good taste in clothes and guitars and very young girls. I know everyones a good person inside, everyone wants just to be loved inside so whenever I think what a dick! What a liar! I'll try to remember the good things inside. WEll your smile is as white as montana, and your eyes as deep as the caspian sea, well I guess these don't count as the things from inside, but these are the things that made me blind. WHat was I thinking? I wasn't thinking at all. If I knew what I did today would I make the same mistake? Uh-huh. I Probably would because your hands are as big as montana and your lips as sweet as red vines and I know these dont count as the things from inside but these are the things that made me blind.
current mood:  crushed
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Thursday, March 2nd, 2006
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7:06 pm - ARTIE- THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WOOOOOOOOOORRRLLLD
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I told Matthew today that I wanted a guy like Jesus only a little less "Son of God" and a little more "Hey let's fuck on the copy machine when nobody is looking"
Seriously, I had the best date prospective this weekend and I think I just ruined ever hearing from this guy.
That's ok. Because I have Pete and Pete season one on DVD.
No, it's not OK. Because I really liked him. But whatever.
OK, If someone really cares about me, we'll say his name is God, then please please please don't let this get back to them and ruin it for me...pppplllleeaaasseeeeee...
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Wednesday, March 1st, 2006
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7:08 pm - so sorry blondie...
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I am missing people like crazy right now.
I miss my ladies in Brandon.
Hell I miss everyone.
I want to get together and do something this weekend, now that i have a car that will make it to brandon.
Someone keeps prank calling me at work. It's really starting to piss me off. The only way they can get to me is by knowing my extension because I am not in the directory.
Random thought-
Guys my age think I act too old for them, older guys think I am too young. What the H, yo?
I am not going to temple tonight. I'm a Bad little buddhist wannabe.
current mood:  calm
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Saturday, February 25th, 2006
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2:56 pm - And then he said "are you a dirty girl?"
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I went iceskating last night with Matthew over in brandon. I got all baby crazy with the cute little kids everywhere.
I'm also bruised to holy hell because I faceplanted on the ice right near the end.
We went to eat and we did shots of Patron which was surprisingly good. Then we sat in my car until almost 3 talking and sobering up before I had to drive home.
Nice evening unless you count the slight rejection I faced. I knew it would happen so it's not too disheartening.
I went to good ol PPHS the other day to see some teachers. Heard delightful gossip and drama, got asked for my number, and all in all got the inspiration back to teach again.
I feel like a different person lately.
I officially have a title at work now. " evironmental health and safety coordinator". I get to have conference calls with people from all over the world every friday. I feel rather grown up. ANd terrified that they have to much faith inmy ability to do this job that I am so underqualified for. They really trust me, its a little scarey.....
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Sunday, February 19th, 2006
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11:29 pm - the cycle of being single
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I have realized that when being single there is a cycle that I and many girls go through. The cycle is as follows...
first there is sadness of being single.
Next you go through insatiable lust where you look at every single guy and think of all the dirty nasty things you'd do to him. Things that are illegal in some states. You fantasize, you lust lust lust lust lust after anything with male genitalia. And the longer it takes for you to get laid, the longer this stage goes on.
Then you have sadness again. You got laid, madeout, fooled around, whatever it was that got you past the lust stage and you are sad again. You remember you are single and that all guys are dogs and you just got fucked (literally) by another one.
Last is the stage where you just want romance and crazy love. You think of weddings and engagements and happiness. You may not even be the marrying type but in this stage you are. You want to be in ridiculous love that lasts until your 80.
They cycle repeats and repeats depending on how long you are single for.
Right now I am in the romance stage for the first time. I've only techincally been single for 3 months. Untechnically though, I've been single since October.
I have this guy I like, he may like me, we may or may not be dating. who knows. But even he does not help the process along. It won't be until his intentions are clear that the cycle stops. which is hopefully soon. I don't know who well I can take going through the lust stage again. That ended in a night of ....embarrasement and umm....experimentation....
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12:15 pm
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My sister filled out one of those stupid ass survey things but I thought her answer to this one was really sweet....
If I had a million dollars ...
i'd buy my mom a house, my sister a free ride through college and europe, myself a house and my dad porsche. me gusta me familia.
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